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Willl he build resentment at the struggle to get him to change whether real or imagined. It seems to me like you are walking into a relationship where there is a significant disconnect from the start. I agree we shouldn't continue if we can't accept each other as we are. And for mormons, the goal is always a temple marriage and a marriage for the eternities. That grad student better be working that hard if he or she wants to make it. Earlier I mentioned "Even if the church believes a bunch of crazy nonsense, and she believes it too, I still really like her and would like to see whether we can have some good intellectual conversations about this stuff. She didn't tell anyone because her own lack self worth and shame petrified her to do anything about it. I wanted that full support though I am certainly not saying that marrying a Mormon ensures that. I hope it all works out for you.
If you can't do that, realizing that your partner may never come around to your side of things, you are not ready to marry this person. Pray about it and follow your heart. Ask her rhetorically if she would dump her religion for her true love. It works, though, because I know that his beliefs have great worth. He never has time for me. Maybe it won't be a big deal. Other lazy Mormon girls turn feminist, many thousands of them. Did he ever buy me anything other than a coffee or a dinner.